Monday, March 1, 2010
My second oldest niece turned eight last week and celebrated with a swimming party at an indoor pool. In her honor I baked Hello, Cupcake's shark attack themed cupcakes, even though 1) I was warned midweek there were already too many cupcakes from the school party and Grammy and 2) after eating cupcakes at the pool, the whole family was going back to her parents' house to have an ice cream party.
But can I tell you something? That's a setup. I've been an aunt for enough years to know that you absolutely cannot upset the very delicate balance of power between sisters. As an aunt I was contractually obligated to go ahead with elaborate cupcake plan even though no one would probably eat any. So I did.
The sharks are made of Twinkies. The recipe in the book called for "dipping" them in melted grey icing, but that didn't work so hot. Thank god I had a silicon brush to paint the rest of the Twinkies.
Making this recipe required buying a large bag of small Swedish fish, a bag of Donettes, 3 packs of Twinkies, and 2 kinds of colored icing gel. I was also supposed to get red Fruit by the Foot and mallowmars (for puffing up the fish cupcakes), but I was so grossed out by everything going in my cart that I had to draw the line somewhere.
I'll admit I was kind of excited about the Twinkies (which I carried home from the supermarket cradled in my arms like a baby, so as to make sure they didn't get squooshed*). When I was a wee young lass my best friend and I used to split a pack of Twinkies for dessert after lunch. I remember them as being amazingly awesome, sort of how I feel about butterscotch krimpets to this day. I had to cut about an inch off the end of each Twinkie to make a shark, so I tried a piece.
Let me tell you, those things are disgusting! I mean disgusting! It was a total gross out. They taste nothing like I remember which made me think that maybe they changed the formula? But now, after several in depth discussions with my family members, we decided there is an age cutoff for people who find Twinkies delicious.
My only addition to the Hello, Cupcake shark attack idea was to make Jaws-like cupcakes with just the fins. (I had to buy an entire package of chocolate wafer cookies and the recipe only used 2. Don't get me started). I know the 3D Twinkie Sharks are really the money 'cakes, but in the future I would dispense with them all together and just make my version. Way more practical, easy, and delicious.
That's all for the stunt baking for now. I need to get back to baking things that actually taste good and won't rot your insides. I'll keep you posted.
*Thanks, Wendy, for the editorial assist!