Well, I Didn't See That One Coming

Coronavirus (COVID-19) started as a news item from a distant land called Wuhan, China. I was pretty sure it would stay there. I don't know why, except when these types of things have happened before, that's kind of how it's gone. Then it was on cruise ships. I would never go on a cruise ship so, still distant land. Then there were a few cases in Washington state and it got very bad in a nursing home, which again, seemed very far and didn't apply to me.

Then there was a man in New York who had it. Actually, he lived in New Rochelle and the more I heard about it (he went to a gathering at his temple and a lot of people caught it), at some point I realized he lives in the same town one of my best friends from college grew up in. Her parents go to his temple and live in the quarantine zone. They are ok. But still, all of the sudden, it was getting closer. 

And after living and working in New York City for more than a decade, I was clear that any kind of highly contagious virus that also has along life on surfaces was bad news. I started to worry. Not that I would get it, really, though I did stop touching things so much and start washing my hands like crazy. I started worrying about work. 

I work for a restaurant group that runs seven large restaurants in New Jersey and Pennsylvania. We started upping our clean down protocols as per CDC recommendations. That was one thing. But then something funny happened that I never saw coming -- people in the news starting telling people not to go to bars and restaurants. People on social media started to say how irresponsible it would be to go out. Very quickly, the restaurant industry became a casualty of Coronavirus. It turns out that highly contagious viruses that become public health crises intersect with hospitality in a big way.

The next 10 days felt like running from an avalanche that we weren't sure was an avalanche til about day 5. There was no leadership from our federal government. The state was slow to move also. The cities are restaurants were in started putting restrictions on our hours and operations -- same day restrictions. Which is unprecedented and completely insane. Also necessary, but I think we may never see a chain of events like we did ever again because people will look back and think, wow, we could have done that better. 

This is a confusing time for everyone on the planet. It just so happens that our industry and my company were at the front of the fallout (well, behind the healthcare workers of course). I have been super keyed in to it because unfortunately I had no choice not to. Now that I am home with my family quarantining and I have some time to process and reflect. 

It is challenging to support the company I had to lay myself off from while also homeschooling by two daughters who are 4 and 8. Their teachers threw together a remote learning program in 72 hours. They go to a Montessori school which is very much about a prepared environment and tangible learning materials. So it's possible that being stuck in my house which is also under construction is not exactly the best place to try and learn. We do what we can while also learning how to all share our days and our space in a constructive way. We practice simple Spanish over crudite platters.  

Half of our downstairs is cordoned off because after 5 years of living in this house we finally pulled the trigger on renovating our kitchen. So our refrigerator, amongst other things, is currently in our living room. And we are trying to stockpile food that will last us days. We are doing dishes in our bathroom. All things considered I think we are handling it much better than we thought it would. 

I know people who have gotten sick from it. It is scary. I don't want anyone to have to go to a hospital right now for anything. 

I have a similar feeling to how I felt on 9/11/01, when I was a student at NYU living in a dorm on Union Square, or when Trump was elected in 2016. I grew up in the 80s and 90s when it seemed like nothing mattered, nothing was ever going to happen, and history was over (there was even a guy who wrote a famous book called "The End of History"). And these events make you realize that you are very much living through history. Personally, I feel like this is 9/11 times 1000. 

We don't know how long we are going to be quarantined at home. We don't know how long our businesses are going to be closed. We don't know what the fallout will be from this virus -- the sick, the ones we will lose. The economic casualties. Will I be one of them?

I keep thinking of my grandmother who grew up on a farm in the Depression. There is a part of me that just thinks, if this is it, if all the boom-times are over, I can deal with that. It might be harder, but it might be simpler. I might have a clearer idea of where I stand. I might be able to focus on other parts of my life that have taken the back seat. 

There is another part of me that feels the calling to work in government. It has come up for me a few times in my life. One of them was at the Women's March. When I was leading people off the boardwalk into Bradley Park, I saw my brother and stopped. He remarked at how amazing it was. As thousands of people walked by me, chanting, empowered, I turned to him and said Jim, "I think I could be president." And he said, "I think you're right." 

Maybe that's ridiculous. But I believe government is important, really important at times like these. I believe I have a calling to serve. I believe I'm smart enough to figure out almost anything. I believe I can broker compromise like it's my superpower. I know how to communicate, and I can give a damn good speech. I don't know if I have the stomach to run for elected office, but I have such a yearning in me to be a part of that world, I think it will be the next chapter of my life. 

. . .

We started a coloring club at work to support the workforce that we had to lay of on Wednesday March 18 because of the government mandated response to COVID-19.

As a business, all our intention is on reopening when this is over. That will be a feat for many restaurants, many won’t survive. However if I ever had to bet on a team, I’d bet on ours at Smith. Pulling off the impossible is our specialty.

So many need support at this time. This problem is bigger than any one person, group, company, or industry. We are dealing with a human problem and all our lives are at stake. With this stunning cascade of events, in this international emergency, our 7 restaurants at Smith had to close their doors last Monday for the health of the public and our employees. Our biggest imperative is that we open up as soon as is feasible when this is all over. When? When. Until then, we are taking it one day a time. 

The thing I have grown to cherish most about the hospitality industry is that a healthy, thriving restaurant requires all different kinds of people in order to function like a well-oiled machine. The breadth of backgrounds, ages, races, professional and education experience, the hard-knock tales. The tales of incredible triumph and transformation. When given an opportunity, a restaurant is a place where a person can rise above wherever they came from to create a new future for themselves and their family. It's usually the person you never see coming who ends up being your champion.

The reality in this country is that most Americans have little-to-no savings for the kind of a head-spinning, lightning fast crisis like the one we find ourselves in with COVID-19. Not for medical bills, not for sudden unemployment. Which is why we wanted to put something out there in the world that might highlight the incredible love and generosity spreading around the world, and create a cushion for our staff in this time of emergency. 

I don't know how you choose where to give right now. I don't like having to ask for handouts. But I do like to color.

https://smithrelief.fund 

P.S.

If you made it this far, don't you agree now's a great time to pass Medicare for All? Call Congress now. 202-224-3121

v 2.0

I submitted my acapella rap to a production going on in Asbury this winter called THE AMERICAN FLAG: TRUMPED. Why not?! I revised it a bit so that it isn't so specific to the time and place it was born. Wanted to share it with you guys, since I'm not at open mics every Tuesday, and it was burning a hole in my pocket. 

The difference is basically more cursing, more anger at the election post-mortems, and my admittance that I never did like Thomas Jefferson. (Listening to the Hamilton soundtrack has only reminded me of my first impression and confirmed my distaste.)

Hamilton State of Mind

My baby cousin’s

got this Hamilton-
non-fiction-
Rapping play on replay.
Michelle Obama,
Music Drama,
And it's on All day...

But we all got that upset-
Trump threat,
PTS - D OD.
It's liberal hell-
Can Lin-Manuel
Take all of this
pain away?

It's just a little hip hop,
Some say,
But they’d be wrong-
ALL Day.

Cuz we all know
That words matter.
The pen shatters
the sword-
Paper smothers the rock-
A bill could kill the glock!

Stronger
together?
There's still time-
Si se puede

Don't be shy.

Putin’s coming

for our democratic government.

The keys to our kingdom

Went to a capitalistic internet.

Wall Street’s getting richer,

While the poor die in the street.

Obamacare can’t save you-

“Live free or die” – Preach!

You think this is all the Davos Man?

Motherfuckin C’MON MAN.

You can’t kid yourself now.

You just thank me later--

Imma tell you how

This shit’s much, much plainer.

It’s so simple that you missed it.

You’re too close,

And now you’re twisted.

It’s that sado-misogynistic-

All-men-created-equal

Thomas Jefferson

hypocrite shit.

It’s ridiculous!
Can’t you see it?

America’s a dream!

So sobeit!

But there’s no rest for the wicked.

And without it, you don’t last.

Guess who invented “this too shall pass.”

Do you have land, for the taking?

Free labor from a chain gang?

Resources for the grist mill?

And/or a reproductive system?

Turn down your white noise,

Forget the Founding Fathers--

It’s that mythic City on the Hill shit,

That when it’s built,

you gotta build a wall around it.

Don’t play stupid with me-

And we’re way past denial,

And whatever you do –

Don’t you tell me to smile.

I’ll come for you softly

Like a hot knife through butter,

I don’t have time for fools,

I’m a full-time working mother.

And I’m done listening to other people

Hollering,

Hogging all the air in the room,

I stopped bothering,

Putting myself in the conversation.

So that’s it! This is my revelation.

I see now, you depend on my participation.

But who am I to say?

And what am I to do?

I’m just gonna to have to be me.

And you’re just gonna to have to be you.

And we’re going to Hamilton

the hell out of this,

And when we look back,

we’ll know we wrote for justice.

We were the voice of welfare,

and the blessings of liberty,

And it was done by little you’s

and little me’s,

From sea to sea to shining sea.

-->

Current Events

Went to the U.S. Open the Tuesday after Labor Day to see the mens' 4th round and women's quarters in a night session. Federer and Wozniacki both won in straight sets, so we got out at a reasonable hour which is nice in my old age, but slightly disappointing compared to 2005 when I saw Agassi beat Blake in a barn burner. Still glad I went and my date declared we should make it a yearly tradition, which is exactly what I've been wanting someone to say to me since I was 14. Victory tastes sweet.

Now I can work on getting to Wimbledon.

Did a sketch for a friend's birthday card yesterday. I need to revive my hobbies or I'm in danger of dissolving into a hybrid couch potato/barfly in my free time. Right now it feels like I'm dabbling in everything and it's not sticking. I've got a Le Carre book languishing on the bed stand, a stalled needlepoint project (I told you, I'm old), and a twice a week running schedule. Ugh.

While waiting for the train home from the Open, my friend and I were talking about current events. I admitted I don't really follow the news anymore. I read the New Yorker and follow NPR via my Facebook feed (it hurts me to come clean about that, I usually refer to it as a "news feed."). It took a long time for me to inquire more about ISIS. Because really, do I want to know more about these people? It's disgusting.

I spent most of my twenties engaged and enraged about the death and suffering caused by the ignorance and righteousness of this country -- that's your takeaway when you study American History at NYU. But at about seve months pregnant with my daughter my fascination and anger turned to sadness, and I realized in order for me to live powerfully I couldn't do it anymore. I've transferred that over to Mr. SevPrez and now he fights the good fight on that front.

I confessed to my friend that I went through old journals and correspondence when we moved and found evidence of a smarter, wittier, more relevant, firecracker version of myself. I was so sure of myself and my opinions! I used to write better. I was unabashed.

Am I a complete milquetoast? Does that come with the territory of marriage, motherhood, and mid-thirtydom? It's disorienting to feel you've lost your shine, but with that comes humility, and with humility comes the opportunity for grace. I do slightly less embarrassing things and make much better sartorial decisions. I can finally cook. Everyday my daughter eats, sleeps, and dances. So if I'm a bit of a dud, at least there's that.

Still. Gotta finish that book, sign up for a race, learn needlepoint, and get to Wimbledon. These are great projects and I should keep them alive. Never give up.

Time Capsule

Stumbled upon this in my old college stuff. Can you believe it's 9 years old? Seems so current.

The Decade In Photos

From the New York Times, reader submitted photos. Maybe not as funny, but much more interesting that those VH1 "I love the 00s" specials.


A lot of people have asked me where I was on September 11th, 2001, having been a junior at NYU at the time. I lived in the same dorm as the woman who took this picture and have a picture taken from the same vantage point from a disposable camera bought at a deli that morning. Seems like a lifetime ago. 


Interestingly enough, my current job had its roots in that day. School was closed for a week and students had nothing to do but drink too much, watch CNN, and argue about politics. I decided I needed to do something more constructive with my time and emailed my current company, offering to take their trash out. Two years later they created a position for me. 


The rest is history.